EMDR Therapy in Surrey and Banstead | Trauma Therapy Online and In Person

EMDR Therapy

Trauma focused therapy in Surrey and online | Adults, teenagers and parents

If you have found your way here, you might already be carrying more than you realise. You do not need to have everything figured out before you begin reading. Sometimes simply recognising a feeling or a pattern is enough.

Maybe you are feeling overwhelmed inside while trying to hold everything together on the outside. Or perhaps you are a parent who has landed here because you see your child or teenager struggling in ways you cannot quite explain. You might notice panic, shutdown, anger, or a loss of confidence that was not there before. Whether you are seeking support for yourself or for a young person you care about, you are welcome here. Some people arrive here after years of feeling misunderstood or different, unsure whether therapy will truly fit them. Many of the people who reach out are used to being the strong one, and may have spent years trying to understand their experiences on their own before considering trauma focused therapy.

From the outside, things may look fine. You show up, keep going, and do what needs to be done. You might be the one others rely on, the one who supports everyone else, the one who rarely stops. Yet inside, things can feel very different.

Your nervous system may stay switched on long after the day has ended. Panic can rise quickly. Anger or rage might appear out of nowhere and then be followed by guilt or self-doubt. At other times you may feel frozen, disconnected, or as though you are watching life through a screen, like a dream or a video game rather than fully being in it. You might want to speak up, set a boundary, or say what you truly feel, but your voice seems to disappear at the last moment.

Many people who land here do not initially think of themselves as having experienced trauma. They simply know that something feels stuck. You might notice your body reacting before your mind understands why. A tight chest when nothing obvious has happened. A sudden surge of panic. A quiet heaviness that never fully lifts. Some young people describe replaying social situations over and over again, feeling intensely embarrassed long after the moment has passed, or dreading school because their body goes into panic even when they want to feel confident.

For others, the reason for being here feels clearer. You may have experienced abuse, an accident, loss, medical trauma, bullying, or a specific event that still comes back through memories, nightmares, or strong emotional reactions. Whether your experiences feel obvious or harder to name, both are valid places to begin.

If any of this feels familiar, EMDR therapy may offer a different way forward.

What is EMDR Therapy and How Can It Help?

Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing, known as EMDR, is an evidence-based therapy that helps the brain process experiences that have remained emotionally or physically activated.

When we go through distressing experiences, the brain sometimes stores them in a way that keeps the nervous system on high alert. This can show up as anxiety, panic, emotional flooding, sudden anger or rage, freezing, self-critical thoughts, or strong body sensations that feel disconnected from the present moment. EMDR is widely used for post-traumatic stress, childhood trauma, accidents, medical experiences, bullying, and other events that continue to feel present in everyday life.

EMDR works with the brain’s natural capacity to integrate experience. Using gentle bilateral stimulation, such as eye movements or tapping, the therapy helps memories become less charged and more settled over time. Many people describe feeling lighter, more grounded, and more able to respond to life rather than feeling driven by old survival patterns.

You do not need to have a single dramatic event to benefit from EMDR. Ongoing relational stress, attachment wounds, social experiences that felt overwhelming, or moments where you felt alone or powerless can all leave a lasting imprint on the nervous system.

A Compassionate and Trauma-Informed Approach to EMDR Therapy

At Compassionate Therapy Practice, EMDR sits within a compassionate, relational way of working.

Before any deeper processing begins, we spend time understanding how your nervous system responds under pressure and building skills that help you stay connected to yourself during difficult moments. This applies equally to adults, young people, and parents supporting their children. We gently strengthen your capacity to feel calmer, more grounded, and more supported within yourself, helping you relate to your experiences with warmth rather than criticism or urgency.

My approach integrates EMDR with Compassion Focused Therapy. This means we are not only working with memories themselves, but also supporting the parts of you that have worked so hard to cope. Many clients, including teenagers and young adults, find this integration helps them feel more understood and less alone in what they are experiencing.

Who EMDR Therapy Can Help: Adults, Teenagers, and Parents Seeking Support for Their Child

EMDR can support adults, young people, and parents who notice:

Feeling constantly on edge or unable to switch off
Sudden panic or waves of anxiety that feel hard to control
Surges of anger or rage followed by shame or self blame
Moments of feeling unreal, distant, or like you are watching yourself from the outside
Freezing when you want to speak up or advocate for yourself
Replaying social situations repeatedly and feeling intense embarrassment afterwards
School related anxiety, bullying experiences, or distress linked to friendships
Flashbacks, intrusive memories, or nightmares
Experiences of abuse, violence, neglect, or significant loss
Birth trauma or medical experiences that still linger
Accidents or single incident events
Emotional numbness or shutdown
A sense of living in survival mode while appearing “fine” on the outside

Parents sometimes reach out because they notice their child or teenager becoming withdrawn, highly anxious, or stuck in cycles of shame after social experiences. EMDR can be adapted in a developmentally sensitive way to support young people as well as adults.

What EMDR Sessions Feel Like

One of the most common worries people have is that EMDR means reliving everything that has happened to them. In reality, the work is collaborative, paced thoughtfully, and grounded in compassion.

You remain present and connected to the here and now. You do not need to describe every detail of an experience for the therapy to be effective.

Alongside EMDR processing, sessions often include grounding work, compassionate imagery, and gentle reflection so that your nervous system can begin to shift at a pace that feels manageable.

Sessions are available online and face to face in Surrey.

EMDR Therapy: Frequently Asked Questions

Do I have to talk in detail about what happened?

Many people find their way to EMDR because they feel exhausted from trying to explain everything over and over again. One of the ways EMDR can feel different from therapies you may have tried before is that it does not rely on long conversations about every detail of the past.

During processing, you do not need to describe everything out loud. Instead, we work gently with how your brain and body hold experiences that still feel emotionally charged, helping them become less overwhelming over time.

At Compassionate Therapy Practice, EMDR sits within a compassionate and relational approach. We move slowly and thoughtfully, supporting you to stay connected to yourself while approaching difficult experiences with warmth rather than pressure.

What does an EMDR session actually feel like?

Many people arrive expecting EMDR to feel intense or overwhelming. In reality, sessions are usually calm, collaborative, and paced gently.

We begin by helping your nervous system feel steadier and more settled before any deeper processing takes place.

Compassion sits at the heart of the work, allowing things to unfold at a pace that feels manageable rather than pressured.

Can EMDR be adapted if I am autistic, ADHD, or neurodivergent?

Yes. EMDR is always shaped around how you process information, rather than expecting you to fit a fixed way of working. Some people prefer clearer structure or more predictability, while others need a slower pace or different ways of engaging with the process.

We can adjust the rhythm of sessions, the type of bilateral stimulation used, and how we prepare for processing so that the work feels accessible and respectful of your sensory needs, communication style, and nervous system.

Many neurodivergent people find EMDR helpful because it does not rely on long explanations or finding the “right words”. We move collaboratively, at a pace that feels manageable for you.

Can teenagers or young people have EMDR therapy?

Yes. EMDR can be adapted in a developmentally sensitive way for children and teenagers. Some young people come with clear experiences such as bullying, loss, or medical events. Others arrive feeling anxious, embarrassed after social situations, or frozen in certain moments without fully understanding why.

The therapy is always tailored to the individual young person, moving at a pace that feels manageable and respectful of their needs.

I am not sure if what I went through counts as trauma. Is EMDR still for me?

Many people feel unsure whether their experiences are “big enough” to bring to therapy. You might simply notice panic, shutdown, anger, or a sense of living in survival mode while appearing fine on the outside.

EMDR can support single events as well as ongoing relational stress or moments that left a lasting emotional imprint. Together, we explore this gently and decide what feels right for you.

How do I know if EMDR is the right approach for me?

You do not need to decide that alone. An initial session gives us space to understand what has been happening for you and what you would like to feel different.

Sometimes EMDR becomes the main focus. Other times we begin with Compassion Focused Therapy or CBT to help you feel more grounded first. The therapy adapts to you, not the other way around.